Will You Marry An Alpha Female ?

Posted on December 6, 2007. Filed under: Man-Women Issues | Tags: , , , |

Let’s imagine a hypothetical situation where an Alpha female is in the marriage market looking for an Alpha male or if not available she would not mind a Beta male.

Will you as an Alpha male or Beta male accept and marry her if all the conditions are right?

Alpha females are those who are successful and rich and make more money than the men.

Before you want to commit, you would like to know what you will be getting into .I cannot be specific with examples but will only speak in general terms. Generally but with exceptions Alpha women are not easy to live with as their expectations of the men are very high.

Even a plain Jane has very high expectations from their men and this is what is causing all those divorces and breakdowns. When we marry, we should not expect too much from each other. The women should not expect the man to be her passport to riches .

In the traditional form of marriage, the men are looked upon as the provider and the women the homemaker. With women’s emancipation and women working, it has created a situation where the woman earns more than the men. The woman now becomes the main provider in a role reversal. This success is causing much friction between the couples.

The financial imbalance is making the women reappraising their roles in the marriage. With her making more money and undertaking more household expenditures, it can breed resentment in her.

She may feel that he is unambitious , lazy or free loaders and not pulling his weight in the marriage. She may resent him spending her hard earned money on something which she may not approve like buying those expensive man toys.

Further more, she feels she is still doing most of the household chores and child minding. She can also feel that he is not doing enough to help her in the housework and baby care giving even though he has given a lot. A lot is still not enough.

There are different social and psychological problems when their roles are reversed. We have been brought up with the gender expectations. When we find that the other side is not fulfilling to our expectations, , our respect and love will fly out the window.

Higher-earning women may struggle to respect their lower paid men .This is due to our social up bringing. In a Christian family, they may overcome this barrier as they have a different concept. They have love and God and do view money in the proper perspective. Money to be spend mutually and not about who is earning more.

In this present world, it is still about status, successful women would definitely feel much better if she can introduce her Alpha man than a beta man. When a successful woman marries a beta man, she may feel the shame or stigma that she married down. She may subconsciously feel that people will have less respect for her.

Alpha women want to be in charge of their lives and careers but they have been conditioned from small that they can look up to the men who will take care of them. When that is not happening, their sense of feminity is affected. They want the cake and eat it as well.

Alpha women often find themselves taking over everything, resulting in them feeling exhausted and irritated. They want everything to be done by their methods. They become very fastidious and a perfectionist.

She becomes the dominant partner and controls him like a kept man. He cannot go out with friends as she will be controlling his expenses .It is very pathetic when the woman controls his money very tightly. He is being belittled and their sex life will be similarly affected. She withholds sex from him as a punishment.

I have seen a case where the wife controlled him and only put $30.00 in his wallet and then when he came back , he had to account for where the money went. There were also curfew hours, he had to be back by 10.30 pm everyday or suffer the consequences. In the end, they were divorced after 30 years of marriage.

When a woman becomes successful, her orientation changes, she cannot see his gentleness and kindness or his other good qualities She focuses on his ambitions, his zeal, his lack of drive to succeed and she feels let down.

Those factors are more important to her .It is more about making money and more money .She uses this criteria to assessed him. When he cannot find in him, she goes to search for a richer and more powerful man and have affairs.

Finally, we come to the conclusion. Do you prefer the traditional way or the modern way?

Will you marry an Alpha female or a beta female?

The traditional way might be best for happiness and marital harmony.

If you are an Alpha female, you lose out to the Beta female unless you are willing to lower down your standards or acquired the Miranda complex and give him back some of the controls. Not to let him know how much you make and to let him think that he is the provider .After the marriage, he will have to accept the truth .If you let him know before marriage, he will be intimidated and disappear from your life..LOL!

 

Credit and thanks to;

http://www.you.co.uk/pages/you/article.html?in_article_id=492714&in_page_id=1908

 

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18 Responses to “Will You Marry An Alpha Female ?”

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comment4, [url=http://www.whitehouse.gov/search/site/LeXxiK%20%D0%9C%D0%BD%D0%B5%20%D0%BD%D0%B0%20%D0%BA%D1%80%D0%B8%D0%B7%D0%B8%D1%81%20%D0%BD%D0%B0%D0%BF%D0%BB%D0%B5%D0%B2%D0%B0%D1%82%D1%8C%2C%20%D0%B2%D1%8B%D0%BB%D0%B5%D0%B7%20%D0%B2%20%D1%82%D0%BE%D0%BF%D0%B5%20%D0%B3%D0%BE%D1%83%20%D0%B1%D1%83%D1%85%D0%B0%D1%82%D1%8C]áóõàòü â òîïå[/url], :-p

YES, i’d marry an alpha female. Plenty of dosh, good looks and I can grow lazy as I grow older. Send him here. Not many in Fort William.

I am an Alpha female. But I did not start out that way. I was once a young girl who married a man 10 years older than me. We were equals. I was just out of college. 12 years after we married, I was running my own successful business and he was working with me. Even though I gave him the higher title, he knew, and everyone knew I was the brains. He had an affair with a girl in the office and married her 6 months after the divorce. It’s been 5 years, he’s flat broke, but he is definitely “the man” in that relationship. What was I to do? Be less intelligent, capable, talented, hard working? I realize there is a price you pay. But if the answer is to hold up a parasol and wait for Mr. Alpha Wonderful to come around, I won’t hold my breath. I married a guy who is my equal intellectually, has a vast social life and takes care of me emotionally. He’s not perfect, but nobody is, not even me. My mother told me once, “find a man who knows how to love you.” For the Alpha Female that is what she needs. Money is not part of that equation, when you have it.

Hi Maria,

I do agree with your views. It is not about money or power but about love. No matter what other thinks, it is only love which can sustain the marriage.

From

Laura1318

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There is a huge misconception about the definition of the Alpha — in both the female and male respect.

Of course true Alphas complement … it’s the Type As who don’t. And when two Alpha’s collide, it’s spiritual.

Alpha is not about money, nor power … it’s about intelligence and confidence and greed. And I’ll defer to urban dictionary b/c being an alpha myself, it’s the best descriptor I’ve found.

“An Alpha Female is a dominant female in a group. She dates as many males as she wants, is strong and confident, and a hard worker as well as often busy. She is usually sarcastic because she’s powerful and playful. Alpha Females are intelligent, intellectual problem solvers; and though being an alpha female is more of a state of mind than a physicality, an alpha understands that dressing up or sexy increases her power in society, so she does it. Alpha Females are often terribly misunderstood by Beta and lesser males, as evident by the other posts about Alpha Females, and when this happens, she’s called a bitch.”

Notice there’s nothing about careers — Alpha is a state of mind. Period. And if one — whether male or female — questions if she/he is an alpha … the answer is NO.

And the Alpha Male:
“Modern Alpha males dictate their own reality, Alpha’s effortlessly change brain patterns of people around them,women and men around alpha’s feel their strong character and charisma and naturally gravitate and follow their leadership skills, this is why women believe everything we say is knowledgeable or humorous and subconsciously fall into our laps.

3. Alpha’s are frequently being considered self-centered assholes. However this could not be further from the truth. We as Alpha males do not cater or sympathize to emotional garbage from insecure women and Beta males, that is not a part of our reality. We see situations in life as our personal stage and have full knowledge and understanding that we control the reality around us, there for the ladies will always have sex with us and the guys will always want to be us.”

I actually have a much better definition of the Alpha male, but I’m saving it for my book

Cudoos to Kaye posting on 5/3/09! Complimenting and respecting one another for their individual roles in a relationship. I found myself unemployed in a country of growing unemployment. My wife’s job is more and more stressful as her job description begins to sound more like that of Wonder Woman and Zena combined. I have taken over ALL household chores & errands including meals and cleanup. This gives her some time to recouperate from her busy schedule and makes me feel like a useful member of our team. After all, it’s all about us against them. Right now we are winning…they haven’t eaten us, yet!

The situation you describe is completely intolerable. No reasonable man would choose such a life. I fear the alpha-female is doomed to choose from the insane, or from well groomed hucksters in search of a sugar-momma.

I think thats a good analogy about complementing. I wish there were some way to find and date alpha women who want beta males.

Laura1318 :-
If you are fated, you will find a alpha female.

Good grief…it’s not about marrying down for an alpha female. It’s about finding the right combination of strengths that each person brings to the table. I’m an alpha female who is comfortable making decisions and comfortable taking charge of everything, including sex. I don’t want an alpha male who resists me every step of the way…and wants me to be submissive. I want a beta male who compliments me and respects my position as head of the household. It doesn’t mean I’m any less feminine or loving than my beta counterparts.

Laura1318 :-

That is another perspective of the situation. It is about complementing each other or the relationship will not last.

hi, would love to be with an alpha female being a beta male. The alpha female will want to take over decision making but the Catch-22 is, will she respect me if i let her? Also, if I let her domesticate me into a house husband, would she not make it too obvious for people?

Okay those are my thoughts, reply back if you’re a hot alpha female and want to chat about it at emailthroughcyberspace”at”gmail


Laura1318 :-

If she has decided to marry down , she would outwardly show respect to you in the society or culture.

There are norms in the society and rules inside the house or marriage. Different rules may apply..

We can only speak in generalizations as not everyone feels the same over this issue.

What a bunch of meaningless generalizations. What is an “Alpha Female?” Are we talking about a self-involved bitch who makes $100k a year who thinks she’s Donald Trump? I once met a woman at a dinner party who subtly bragged about her salary after I poked fun at myself for being broke. I got a chuckle when she revealed that her all-important career was in marketing. She then asked what I did, smugly certain that she was about to completely emasculate me. After I replied that I was a principal investigator at a medical research institute, her entire demeanor seemed to completely deflate and she didn’t speak to me the rest of the evening. For all the female whining about the male ego, the female ego is just as fragile.

I LOVE beta female and wish marry her >>
Because the life with her are very quiet and happiness

Laura1318:- That is true. Never marry an over ambitious female,she will step over your head in time.

I think there are plenty of beta males who would be very happy married to an Alpha Female. Just because a beta male does not strive to climb the corporate ladder, does not make him lazy or not an asset. For a busy Alpha Female, how would it not be an asset for her to have a partner there for her providing the household support that she needs? Not all beta males sit around ticked off that their Alpha partner makes more money. Many are happy to have her in charge and willingly clean, cook, run errands, do the laundry and provide whatever other services that their in charge wives require.

Laura1318:- There are males as you described but in the end it is the woman’s perspective that hold the relationship together.If she is satisfied and resigned to be with a beta male , then there is no problem.

In answer to “WILL I MARRY AN ALPHA FEMALE”Yes I surely will but must admit being a alpha male myself the temptation is greater to rather marry a beta female. Never before have I really looked at relationships, flirting, dating etc in the same way as they do in the animal kingdom. Only recently have I become aware of this reality and am learning SO much. If im an Alpha male, Im not sure, but I think so. Im self employed and feel strongly on being the provider in a family, from buying the house to providing for my wife and family suffeceintly. I dont always agree with everything and anything people say and hold my own views, Im very confident in the things I do and when feeling threatened I normally rise above the situation. I am in a relationship for the past 10 years and I think my girlfriend is also alpha. She is very controlling and seems to know everything about everything, she has an excellent memory. She owns her own house and looks after her 76 year old mom who she also controls, she is a neat freak and competes without me even being aware theroff. After becoming aware of the status in relationships I feel somehow empowered and understand things much clearerer. Im not even sure these days if our relationship will workout to marriage because we both posses strong will and want to be in charge.This causes many a time a stand off resulting into arguments. ANY ADVISE FROM YOU EXPERTS OUT THERE. I did date beta women before but did not find it a challenge to be in, whilst enjoying the challenge with an alpa female I somehow want to get ontop of this “game”, am I not thinking straight, will I ever or how should I aproach this relationship?????PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!

Hi everyone,
In regards to “its Ying and Yang” I would have to say that I totally agree. Sometimes we can be extremely extroverted with people who are not as extroverted as us. Then when it comes to people on that higher level, then we become the more introverted ones. Its funny how that works. I think its way too much effort to become extroverted with everyone that you meet. But at the same time, its probably not healthy to judge people by these standards.

With that aside I think the point that you are trying to make is that alpha females can and will date an alpha male because she will be more submissive around him.

see the rest of the post @

http://www.hotalphafemale.blogspot.com

Hot Alpha Female

In response to Laura 1318’s assertion that a woman can only be an alpha or a beta “she cannot be both”, i would contend that it is perfectly possible to fufill both roles. I find in myself that I am generally very strong amongst other women and most men. I can be extremely successful and bold, but amongst the right alpha(s) I automatically become a beta. I think this can be true of all women, it just matters what and whom you respect in life, and what qualities you show deference to.

Every woman holds different human qualities in high regards, especially those of the men they are attracted to. Some value money, prowess in sports, outgoing confidence in high regards, while many find other qualities to be of more importance.

I find that with the right man, or support from the right men, i can not only be an alpha to the outside world but can also be a beta amongst them (submissive, feminine, and charming as you stated it). But they first of all must prove to be my image of an alpha.

I would happily marry an Alpha Female. I have no problem whatsoever with the thought of my wife being the breadwinner, head of the house and decision maker.

What’s more I would be happy to take on all duties around the house – from raising children to housework. I wouldn’t resent the fact that my wife was making more money than me for one second.

I think there are a lot of Beta Males out there that feel the same as me.

The Beta man. Is that what they call him? Well here i am and only recently did i realise that maybe my standards of guys is a little higher than everyone else.

You know that part where u say the alpha women focuses too much on the success of her beta male and becomes frustrated?! I was like crap thats exactly like me!

One thing i have experienced is all that i have ever dated have been beta males!!! No wonder!!! You know i was always the one that was teaching them how to do things and behave. That ultimately leads to you not really respecting who they are, having far too much control and basically getting bored and frustrated out your mind!

One cause for concern is though … will the alpha male want an alpha female? Does he like the challenge or is it just a little too much for him. He is so used having all the control and all of a sudden he doesn’t have that anymore

neways food for thought

Hot Alpha Female

http://www.hotalphafemale.blogspot.com

————————————————————————————————————–

Laura1318; The beta man is some one who earns less than you. Not all Alpha males are the same. Generally speaking, most Alpha males prefer a beta female for their submissiveness, feminine qualities and charm. If you are a woman, you would like a man to treat you like a woman. The reverse is true, if you treat a man like a man, then he will love to be friends with you.

Beta females are better because they treat the man like a man. That is what separates the Alpha and Beta woman. When a woman let success goes into her head, everything beneath her is not worth her dignity. They are no more interested in a normal man. They are looking for Superman! LOL!

An Alpha female tend to be aggressive like the males and forgets her feminine virtues. No matter how much you earn or make more than the men, you are basically a female. The concept of a woman and wife in a male mind has not evolved much.

She earns more than him and when you have reached that stage, you begin to expect a higher standard from your would be suitors. That is why, the higher you go, the less your chances of finding your one and only mate. They are either all taken up or they are not interested in an Alpha female.

Now that the Alpha women have reached the pinnacle of success, why should she go look for someone the same level or higher than her? She cannot look up any higher, she has to look down. That is the crux of her problem. Women were lead to believe that they need to marry a richer and stronger man to look after them or to fall back on when they cannot work. This is deeply ingrained in a woman’s psychology..

The modern woman have one foot in the old traditional values and one foot in the new modern woman concept.. She switches back and forth whichever serves her best. You are either one or the other , you cannot be both.


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